Teddy Tour

One Response to “Boys get sexually abused too. Some uncles should not watch over nephews”

1. By Jennifer Dolan on Apr 1, 2008 | Reply

   From: fallenthroughthecracks@hotmail.com
   To: fallenthroughthecracks@hotmail.com
   Subject:
   Date: Fri, 28 Mar 2008 20:55:00 +1030

   My name is Sue.

   Last week a case was handed down in Brisbane Family Court that has been in the court for almost ten years.

   The parents split when the boys were 6 months old. The mother agreed to consent orders for weekend access, but when the boys were about three, they started coming home with disturbing accounts of things they stated that the father had done to them.

   Eventually, DOCs and the police got involved. There was a notification made by Crisis Care (Out of Hours DOCs) where there was a substantiation made that the boys were at risk of sexual abuse from their father. This substantiation still stands with the now Dept of Child Safety.

   In the 1st hearing (a part heard trial only) before the Family Court this information was NOT tendered by any parties (the mother didn’t know it existed as DOC’s had never notified her of the finding they made) and so the Family Court made a finding that the father was NOT a risk to the boys. It was an INTERIM (meaning not final) decision.

   At the subsequent 14day trial, (22 months later (2003) the mother was Self Represented because Legal Aid said her case had “No Merit” due to the earlier finding. The father had a Barrister and the Children’s Representative did too. The Child Rep argued that the father was not a risk.

   After 14 days and seeing ALL the evidence, including medical evidence that one of the boys had an anal tear and bleeding (the father claimed the bleeding was due to constipation, the children’s general practitioner having examined them over a long period of time ruled it out), the court found that the father was a risk of sexual abuse to the boys. The father appealed (2004) and the Full Court upheld the decision that the father was a risk to the children.

   The boys were forced to keep seeing the father at supervised contact. This was extremely distressing to them and in 2005 the boys’ behaviour was so critical (one of them threatening to kill himself and his mother; both boys being very aggressive and angry with the mother at being forced to seeing the man they claimed had done something very hurtful to them) the mother finally moved them interstate after not being able to get any help for them. The Child Rep filed a recovery order and 9 months later they were found.

   She was brought before the court again early last year and the boys were again forced to have supervised contact with their father (their abuser).

   The father filed a new application to the court. This was then heard by yet another Judge The judge thought that the first decision (the interim one) where the father was found NOT to be a risk was a Final decision and therefore the second decision and Appeal were both wrong.

   It was on this basis that the judge re-opened the whole case. On the last day of this hearing, the judge finally figured out that the first decision was only an interim one, and that is why the second judge could over-rule it. It was too late, the whole case had already been re-opened and THAT was in fact on the basis of a legal error. But this time, all the evidence was not tendered. The medical evidence was NOT tendered as the judge disallowed this evidence at his “discretion.” The mother again was self represented after Legal Aid last year did not point out to the court that the first decision was only an Interim one.

   This time the Child Rep has argued that the boys should go to live with their father near Mackay (he has never had any fulltime care of them before. He and his brand new wife are untested parents in their late 40’s). Mum lives in Brisbane with the children’s’ extended family and the children go to school with all their cousins. This is the only family they have ever known.

   The children have NOW been handed over to the father (their abuser). The mother was ordered to take the children to the court building in the morning to have the orders explained to them. Once there, they were told that they had to go and live with the father with no idea that this was going to happen, and the man that they had consistently stated did terrible things to them when they were smaller.

   They didn’t even get to say goodbye to their mum, their grand-parents, cousins and any of their friends, the only family they have known for almost ten years. Their entire lives have been ripped apart and none of the agencies want to do anything about it.

   These children have been taken off the mother on the basis that she has a mental illness. Yet there was NO evidence of this other than a “Provisional Diagnosis” by a psychiatrist based on an hours discussion. Another psychiatrist had seen the mother over many months after the first Judge thought she would benefit from some counseling and this Psychiatrist had provided a full report before the court that she did not have a mental illness, but she was anxious about the plight of her children. That psychiatrist has died and this court did not put any weight on his report.

   Another psychiatrist also provided a report to the court this time that stated that the mother did not have a mental disorder. The boys also had to see a Child Psychiatrist and they made a number of disclosures to him and expressed their wishes that they not have to see their father. They actually accused him of the abuse in front of the father and still no one wants to do anything about this.

   The boys have made clear verbal disclosures of sexual abuse since they were almost three, there is medical evidence (not tendered for this trial but known to the court), and it is undisputed that they have suffered rectal bleeding AFTER contact with the father (he says it was constipation even after a doctor ruled it out in their case.) There is still one current notification from DOCs (Child Safety now) where the father was substantiated as being a risk if sexual abuse to the children.

   These children are my nephews, the mother is my sister. We need to raise funds to appeal this dreadful decision and we are running out of time. Please help us appeal and get these boys back to their family. This Judge has failed these children.

   Their names cannot be revealed but the case is published under J v B (2008).

   You can make a gift at any Bendigo Bank or Direct Deposit (via Internet) to:

   Account Name: Fallen through the Cracks

   BSB: 633 000

   Account Number: 133320010

   Thank you for reading their story. We only have two weeks left to raise money for the appeal and get the boys home safe.

   Sue.

   A Message from their Mother.

   Please help me protect my children….

   I am just a MUM WHO HAS SPENT MY CHILDRENS ENTIRE LIVES TRYING TO PROTECT THEM FROM ABUSE.

   I said many years ago and I believed, that it was not only my right to protect my children but my obligation to do so, no matter what!

   For 9 1/2 years I have been there for my children. The reality is that I do not have the right to protect my children.

   When my children first made clear statements of abuse I was not believed until medical evidence was presented. If you think, that is enough, your wrong - unless you have a confession or 100% DNA proof, then you may have a slight possibility of being believed.

   My children not only displayed behavioural problems, they made clear disclosures to a number of professionals who did nothing.

   Their memories are of a person who has violated them, who threatened to kill me, their mother, who has verbally, physically and emotionally abused them.

   Eventually I managed to get supervised contact with their abuser.

   Now this person has been given sole care of these two children by the Court. They were riped out of a room without any knowledge that this was the last hug; the last “I love You”; the last time they would see anyone that they have any connection with. This would have been the most traumatic experience for the children who have a very close relationship with myself and their maternal grandparents and extended family.

   There have been many so called “professionals and agencies” at last count over 52 that have impacted on my children and myself to our detriment. They have endured the abuse at the hands of their abuser; they have begged, they have cried, they have screamed; they have run away; all under the eyes of these so called professionals - they have been ignored. The children have looked to me for their safety which up until a few days ago, I had managed to keep them relatively safe.

   They have endured the systems abuse by these so called child protective bodies that purport to do what is in the “best interests of the children”. Now they have been taken from the only person who has tried to protect them and been given to their abuser and alienated from not only me (their mother) but their entire extended family and friends.

   Put yourself in these children’s shoes!

   These children believe that they are being punished. They have done nothing wrong, it is up to all of us to make a difference - it is our obligation to protect not just these two little children but all children from abuse, it is our duty of care! I want my children to know that there are people, who do care, that, just don’t “talk the talk” but “walk the walk”.

   Please help protect my children by sending your gift of money so I can have my children returned to the loving home that they have been ripped away from and help other parents who face the same injustices. PRAY FOR MY CHILDREN!